Tuesday, 19 October 2010

The Lazy Person’s Guide to Life: Apathy Made Easy

by Gray Joliffe

This was probably the very first book I bought in England, back in 1995. It could have changed my life then if only I were not so busy working and really followed its advice. Still, it was and remains a great source of wisdom for me. Check it out — if you can get your hands on it.

Dinner conversation

  • Ecology It’s all a good idea. Whales should be saved and you agree wholeheartedly about that, except as far as you knew they were all pretty strong swimmers anyway. Rhinos should also be saved, but where would you get a rubber ring big enough to go round them?
  • Health

    Ask any biologist or anybody in the medical profession, and if they’re honest they will tell you that the single most effective way to be lithe, muscular, good-looking, fit, healthy and generally obnoxious, with every chance of living to a ripe old age, is to choose the right parents. But you didn’t, did you?

    Insurance and mortgages

    Don’t bother with either of these unless you really have to.


    Procrastination is a loafer’s best friend. Leave something until it can no longer be left, and there is a reasonable chance that
    • it will no longer need doing, or
    • someone else will have done it before you got round to it.


    Lazy sex is perfectly normal and you shouldn’t feel guilty if you indulge in it. What’s more, women can be just as lazy in bed as men, though many of them are too modest to admit it.


    Don’t be ridiculous.

    What to do on holiday



    — wait, I have another blog for those quotes.

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